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REVIEW MY PROFILE | Forum

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AmeliaCastillo
AmeliaCastillo May 18 '15
Can you please review and comment on my profile that I recently updated? I didn't put info on general things like interests, hobbies, qualities that I'm looking for, because I want to reserve it on the communication phase in order not to run out of topic for sharing.

What I'm worried about is that my statements might be intimidating due to being frank and straightforward. I experienced meeting guys online and just as we start getting fond of each other, the guy has to back off after realizing he can't manage a LDR due to physical separation ( they want somebody they can touch, date, kiss, etc.) and the financial affordability of meeting up. I've seen the success stories mostly came up because the hispanic ladies are just near the US. Actually, my preference is more on americans or any english-speaking nationality. Another factor is the place I'm in right now wherein the guys are afraid I might oblige them to come here. I stay in this place only because of my work and the benefits that would enable me to travel. If I stay in my country I'll have to think twice or thrice before I can decide to spend my money on travelling. If the guy can't afford to travel for a meet-up I can come to his place but securing a visa is not that easy for somebody like me coming from a 3rd world country.

spectrumAU Moderator
spectrumAU May 18 '15
I would strongly suggest that you do put in some interests.  How else will someone think "Hey, here's a person I can share 'that' interest with"?  It is common interests that attract attention in the first place so you are doing yourself a disservice.


It is highly unlikely that you'll run out of discussion topics.  If the interest is mutual you'll always find something to chat about also having a mutual interest gives a startup subject as well.

AmeliaCastillo
AmeliaCastillo May 18 '15
Thanks, I appreciate your suggestion.
billyHill Moderator
billyHill May 18 '15
first of all, paragraphs. one general thought goes into a paragraph ( and it isn't this is all about me). A "return" or "enter" to separate lines are needed.

"working as....."   Sounds to me like you are announcing to the world that you have a good job, good pay, etc. Not that its a bad thing to have, but do you really need to make the announcement to the whole world? I think it would suffice to say "I have the ability to meet you in your part of the world, so long as you are willing to come visit me, too".... ( or something similar).

"
Guy must have the financial capability....."  I think most men would interpret this line as "she is a gold digger", regardless of what the rest of the sentence says.  If you leave the word "financial" out of the sentence, it won't seem like a direct "I am only after your money" statement, and it still gets the meaning across.

"
.....either on Skype, WeChat or Tango."  -- I'm going to go out on a limb here and take a guess that WeChat and Tango are video chat IM programs similar to Skype, Yahoo IM, and other of the dozens or hundreds of video chat programs on the market now?? Why does it have to be only those 3?? That seems like an outrageous request from someone I don't even know. Being the romance scam victim I am, makes me think you have software to record what takes place in those 3 programs, so you'd want to use them only. Not to mention the fact that different parts of the world (and different devices) use different programs. I honestly have never heard of "WeChat" nor "Tango" until I read them on your profile.
I think that part of the sentence needs to be changed to " a video chat program...." and end it there. You can figure out which program to use in emails/PM's.

"
I'm willing to relocate........" along the lines of your employment, good to know, but I don't think its good to announce it to the entire world. Even if you disguised it more by saying "for the right guy, I am willing to relocate....." I just don't see it being something worthy of announcing to the entire planet. ( We are posting on the World Wide Web here, I am not exaggerating these statements).  

"
I have no criteria since I'm old enough to know what I want and what's good for me."
No criteria is a bad omission, period. Especially because you are old enough to know what you want, and what is good for you, but you don't tell anyone else??  In all honesty, that seems ridiculous!! " I know what I want, but I'm not going to tell you"..... is the exact same thought, but it doesn't sound so good when I say it like that, does it?? List some things, start with the most important, end with the least important. Even if it is only 2 or 5 things you can find, find them. You are not a child waiting for a Christmas present, you are an adult. No one should have to guess at "what do you want" or "what do you like" or "is this good for her", or anything like that.



The Forum post is edited by billyHill May 18 '15
AmeliaCastillo
AmeliaCastillo May 18 '15
Thanks Billy for your nice comments. It did made me realize that the trend of thought of males is quite different from females. You made very good points which I appreciate and will apply ASAP. But can I give my side why I have written such things and gave me second thoughts that's why i request for a review?


You see I am a Filipina working in the middle east and the guys I met online (most of the time) have no idea how is the life here. This is a very strict country where everything is regulated, yes even the communications. Do you know that Viber is banned here? And they are finding ways to regulate other applications as well. Mentioning WeChat and Tango was only a suggestion because that is the apps with good signal or reception, Skype not so much. Yahoo YM is quite obsolete here and if I'll use it for video chat I would need a higher connection. Unfortunately, I am only using a smartphone for all my communication requirements.


Like what i said earlier i have to "announce" that I work in the middle east for the guy to understand why i am not in my own country and also, to emphasize that i am gainfully employed and not to be suspected as a scammer.


Financial - some guys had verified my legal existence (not a scammer) communicates and exchange information and when we finally get to the point that we need to meet that's the time he realizes that he wanted to be with me soon but don't have the "financial capability" to travel. As for me, I can afford the travel expenses BUT GETTING A VISA is the problem. People from 3rd world countries don't enjoy the same privileges that Americans and Europeans do where you can travel to 251 countries without need of visa for 30 days stay. If pride don't get in the way actually it can be arranged. Some guys when they learned that i am in the middle east would immediately back off thinking i would require them to visit me here. I think being in this location is also a turn-off for guys.


I'm willing to relocate - I don't have children and other "baggages" that makes me free to decide anywhere and anytime i need to leave. I thought it is a plus factor but anyway I will follow  your suggestion.


About the criteria - as much as possible I don't want to set parameters that would discourage any "prospect" if they don't meet what I want. Maybe I will just give some general suggestion.


All in all, I really appreciate sharing your opinion and suggestions.

Thank you so much.

billyHill Moderator
billyHill May 19 '15
Things like those long explanations you just gave for such short sentences in your profile are the reasons I gave you for what others might be thinking when they see your profile.

They can see you are in Saudi Arabia, when they look at your profile. They might not know everything that living in Saudi means, but If they decide to start chatting with you, then prior to the chats you can tell them all that stuff about regulated communications. A profile is just a small snapshot of you, a sort of "bait" to catch the fish, so to speak. FWIW, I've never heard of "Viber", either. but any of that stuff is just a search away for any of us, so ultimately it does not matter until the time of chatting, anyhow.

I know what a drag getting a Visa is, like you my wife is a Filipina, and it took a year and half  to process a Visa out of the Philippines after we were married in Manila.  I'd imagine there are also a lot of political reasons that go along with Saudi residents wanting to go elsewhere in the world, too. Those reasons will vary with the relations of the other nations at the moment. And if you think it is important to tell that you are an expat just working in Saudi, mention that as well.
Littlehazeleyes55616
Hello, I'm new on here so I was wondering if you can review and comment on my profile. Thank You
spectrumAU Moderator
spectrumAU Aug 31 '15
LHE this is Amelia's review thread.  You need to start your own.  Just click the New Topic button at the top and away you go.

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