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Latest online |
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·Check your private messages
 
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 MnChina
Newbie
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Age: 50
Looking for: Marriage
Country: China
State, City: Zhejiang
Posts: 2
Status: Offline
Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:37 am
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If you found out that someone made you believe that he/she loves you, then go back to reality and accept that he/she doesn't love you, which is the truth. That person doesn't really love you because he/she just used you. It hurts, yes, then accept what you are feeling. But don't stop there. Accept that you are hurting and you need healing. Choose to forgive just like what Louise said and make efforts to move on. Be thankful that you found it out before you made big decisions like marrying that person. Charge everything to experience but don't let it ruin you as a person. Learn from it and share to others what you have learned in the process. Sometimes, we need to pass this experience for our maturity.
There is hope.
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spectrumAU
Wizard of Oz
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Age: 62
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: Australia
State, City: New South Wales, Sydney
Posts: 1912
Status: Online
Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 8:45 am
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Oh I didn't say forgive, that is extremely hard, especially when you're hurting. But you do need to put that person well out of your mind and be glad you found the truth sooner rather than later. Recognising and accepting that fact helps in the healing process. Allowing you to move on and find the one who is the right 'fit'.
_________________
 ~Louise~
Laughter (n): A smile having an orgasm
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queenelizabeth143
Member
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Age: 39
Looking for: Friendship
Country: Philippines
State, City: Quezon City
Posts: 118
Status: Offline
Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 1:25 pm
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Thank you Colorado, billyhill, Ms. Louise & MnChina.
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nimfa
Member
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Age: 50
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: Philippines
State, City: Quezon City
Posts: 14
Status: Offline
Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 11:24 pm
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Hi! my kababayan. I believe what they have said. I myself easily fall in love, but I have learned my lessons and revenge is not the answer. It takes time to heal but sooner you will realize, life must go on. Remember, there are only 2 people in this world, one that finds joy in deception and one that falls in deception.
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Ìèðåíà
Irina, Russian
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Age: 44
Looking for: Friendship
Country: Russia
State, City: Nizhny Novgorod
Posts: 437
Status: Offline
Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:22 am
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if a person was in love, but in the process of communication realized that you do not approach to him ... then there is nothing wrong, even if you already fell in love. should be glad that you are not married and have does not appeared kids - then it would be much more difficult. hence it was not your man. need to move on.
each of us need someone who loves us with and accepts such we are.
_________________
Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire. (La Rochefoucauld)
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queenelizabeth143
Member
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Age: 39
Looking for: Friendship
Country: Philippines
State, City: Quezon City
Posts: 118
Status: Offline
Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2012 12:28 pm
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Thank you Nimfa!!!
Yes...You are correct Irina!!!
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 mike00199
Board Guru
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Age: 54
Looking for: Romance
Country: United Kingdom
State, City: london
Posts: 639
Status: Offline
Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2013 8:36 pm
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It just endorses my opinion that with this type of meeting online it isnt something to come to a conclusion with really...................its confusing infatuation with real life.Falling in love with someone dosnt happen overnight or with an image!You need to meet that person in real time and take time to really get to know them!
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lostincyberspace
Missing my mind the most!
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Age: 40
Looking for: Friendship
Country: Cambodia
State, City: Phnom Penh
Posts: 62
Status: Offline
Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 2:46 pm
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The thing about new age of modern dating is its taken an aspect that dating in the '"real world'" we take for granted. Where are you may meet and connect with someone on a level that may feel as real as anything you have been able to achieve with a person you were dating in the same town, but the difference is I find that a lot of people use the anonymity of the net to hide certain aspects of themselves. They end up not only misrepresenting themselves but are leading false lives even multiple lives. That is why you must remain guarded and protect yourself from those who try to deceive. Its just a precaution.
Blindly trusting someone you have never meet is not the wisest thing you could do. Trust is ultimately something that must be earned.
Taking a chance on love leaves you vulnerable to getting hurt and possibly being disappointed, but that is the risk you take when you allow someone to get close to you. Dating online in real life this is the risk you take. But nothing in life worth keeping doesn't come with risks of falling.
_________________
Live life like you love...w/o fear!
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Leslie Marquez
Board Enthusiast
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Age: 72
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: Singapore
State, City: singapore city
Posts: 261
Status: Offline
Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:06 am
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Very well said lostincyberspace!
It is important to be carefu lwhere you place your trust..Many a times that a person says " trust me " but consequently doesn't quite earn your trust..Why? Because, many times, he falls short of his promises, and your expectations fail, leaves you wishing you hadn't placed your trust in him in the first place..Never place your trust in someone who proves not be be very trustworthy..
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Lis G
Member
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Age: 42
Looking for: Friendship
Country: Venezuela
State, City: Miranda
Posts: 72
Status: Offline
Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2013 8:20 pm
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| Overcoming fears |
Well, I have to say this: after reading your posts I'm a little nervous about two things:
First of all, I really worry for I read so many wise sensible advice from nice women, I can't help but telling myself: "okay, these mature sensible down to earth women are also in the search of love, I assume, so what chances can I ever have?"
Yes, you may laugh, but it´s kind of scary
On the other hand, I kept myself away from dating pages for a while because of an ugly experience. I´d like to share it in case it helps fellow DnM ers
I was registered for this site for Latin women and this man starts corresponding with me, he said he was from London, had a daughter and his father had just passed away leaving some unfinished business in Turkey.
I wrote back and told him about myself, he was extremely religious, almost writing about God every two sentences. I found it weird but kept on answering his messages.
Well, after the third letter he says he thinks I´m his soul mate, he had sent me pics of his deceased wife and her beautiful daughter, also of his deceased father and some friends, it all seem so believable.
Now, I'm fortunate to have very good friends and they told me to be careful. I didn't know what to do, so I visited some forums to know about the site's reputation.
Well, there were different opinions on the site, but there was a constant factor: many women were telling stories about a widowed british guy who fell in love with them after a very short time and even proposed to them.
Now, the shocking part: after the proposal this man would write telling the brde-to-be that he needed to attend some business abroad. On his next email he would say that something terrible had happened to him (he got mugged, his daughter was n the hospital, etc) and he desperately needed some money. He was really convincent, apologizing and saying that the bride-to-be was almost family to him, that she was the only person he trusted, the one he loved and was about to marry, etc.
Well, surprisingly enough, some women would buy his story and actually send him money.
I don't blame them though, I guess latin women are usually emotional and caring and a little naive (I know I am) and much less expose to organized crime so to speak than women from the first world, maybe
Well, whatever the reason, these felons hurt their feelings and took their money, what a pity
I have the name and pics of the one who contacted me. I stopped answering his emails after I read these women's testimonies on the forum. And he deleted his profile there shortly after.
I was so upset that I deleted mine, too. But I learned the lesson; and it took me several months to ever think of creating a profile on another site.
Now, after reading DnM's rules I thought I would give it a try. And so far things have gone smoothly, I hope it is always like this.
And I'm so new around, you don't have to take my word for it; but this is a true story, my testimony.
I just wanted to share it with you because this thread is so interesting and I wanted to contribute and maybe get a feedback from women in my situation.
I hope it wasn't too long, I couldn't make it shorter. 
_________________
"Loneliness is very beautiful, when you can tell someone." Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer
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