 fernan004
Newbie
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Age: 59
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: United States
State, City: california
Posts: 7
Status: Offline
Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 5:54 pm
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| my son |
Will somebody give a lil advice pls. My son, 30s lives with his mother, 2 yrs unemployed. Don't know why. Always ask money frm me. Then,,i fed up and said, ' why can't you help your self?" Then he became sensitive, blocked me frm FB. Never talk to me. Now, i still miss him. Any thought?
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If she's dumb enough to let you go, Be smart enough to walk away. smile.
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 Leslie Marquez
Board Enthusiast
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Age: 72
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: Singapore
State, City: singapore city
Posts: 259
Status: Offline
Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 10:44 am
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You can help your son to fend for himself...Stop giving financial support..Unless he has a problem to look for job,at that age he should be working for himself..
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billyHill
The Humble Opinion of.....
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Age: 48
Looking for: Friendship
Country: United States
State, City: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 250
Status: Offline
Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:27 pm
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tell him to get the **** out of your house!!! He is 30, not 13. If that means he needs to live on the sidewalk, then that is what it means.
Chances are good it will motivate him to realize a homeless life is not what he wants.... Therefore a job, his own place, and all that good stuff that goes along with it will come in time.
Stop treating him like a child and let him grow up.
If he has some type of mental disorder that prevents him from such a life, then check with his doctor for advice. Halfway houses and similar set ups are available throughout the country for those situations.
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_____________________
Say what you mean and do what you feel,
because those that mind don't matter,
and those that matter don't mind.
- Dr. Seuss
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Jstnona
Member
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Age: 79
Looking for: Friendship
Country: United States
State, City: Florida, Middleburg
Posts: 150
Status: Offline
Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 5:09 pm
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Sensitive situation...so easy to enable our children. But, doing so we can cripple them. Resulting in learned helplessness.
Although his rejection was painful...sounds like tough love is the only alternative. Is your rapport with his mother strong enough for you to join forces? To make beneficial decisions.
For, if something should happen to his mother and you....though thirty, how would he survive? He has not been given the opportunity to learn life skills/survival.
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Youth and enthusiasm are no match for Age and Treachery...
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Bulbanna
Member
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Age: 35
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: Poland
State, City: Gdansk
Posts: 36
Status: Offline
Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 4:00 pm
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Well, such a situation is unthinkable for me. I moved out early from my parents house, and though later I sometimes stayed with them, I have been financially independent since my late teens. Ask parents for money? This is out of the question, I guess when you're grown up the roles reverse, and it is us, children who should help and take care of our parents.
In the situation described in the original post something is very wrong. It doesn't have to be the son's only fault - I don't want to diagnose anyone long-distance but perhaps the mother here is to blame. She may have created the whole situation, consciously or not.
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Just call me Ola 
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fernan004
Newbie
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Age: 59
Looking for: Serious Relationship
Country: United States
State, City: california
Posts: 7
Status: Offline
Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 9:39 pm
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Thanks guys... i appreciate.
_________________
If she's dumb enough to let you go, Be smart enough to walk away. smile.
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mike00199
Board Guru
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Age: 54
Looking for: Romance
Country: United Kingdom
State, City: london
Posts: 639
Status: Offline
Posted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 7:10 pm
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Wow my ole man would have "outed" me years ago lol
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