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Installing a Husband | Forum

Topic location: Forum home » General » Jokes
Number1
Number1 Nov 28 '15

 INSTALLING A HUSBAND



 


Dear
Tech Support
,




Last year I
upgraded from Boyfriend
5.0
to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct


Slow down in
overall system performance, particularly in the flower and


Jewelry
applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.




In addition,
Husband 1.0
uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as


·   
   
Romance 9.5
and


·   
   
Personal Attention
6.5,
and then installed undesirable
programs such as


·
       
NHL
5.0,


·        CFL
3.0

 
and


·
     
Golf Clubs
4.1
.




Conversation
8.0
no longer runs,
and Housecleaning
2.
6
simply crashes the system.




·   
   
Please note that I have tried
running Nagging
5.3
to fix these problems, but to no avail.




What can I do?




Signed,


Desperate.








DEAR
DESPERATE
,




First, keep in
mind,


·   
   
Boyfriend
5.0
is an Entertainment Package,
while


·   
   
Husband
1.0
is an operating system.




Please enter
command: ithoughtyoulovedme.HTML and try to
download Tears
6.2

and do not forget to install the
 Guilt
3.0
update.


·   
   
If that application works as
designed, Husband
1.0
 should then automatically run theapplications Jewelry 2.0 and
Flowers 3.5.




However,
remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
 Grumpy
Silence 2.5
, Happy Hour 7.0 or
Beer 6.1.


·
       
Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very
bad program that will download the Farting andSnoring Loudly Beta.




Whatever you
do,
DO
NOT
under any
circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in
the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)




In addition,
please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program.These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.




In summary,
Husband 1.0
is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new
applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve
memory and performance. We recommend


·
      
Cooking
3.0
and


·
      
Hot
Lingerie 7.7.




Good Luck
Babe!




Tech
Support


 




billyHill Moderator
billyHill Nov 28 '15
.

davemac
davemac Apr 2 '17
The best description of how a real computer should work, but before buying any version of Wife make sure you get the Pro package which includes an On/Off switch.
billyHill Moderator
billyHill Apr 7 '17
yeah, sure.... as if such a feature is available at all. The only feature know is that Ms Right will likely turn into Mrs Always Right after Wife is installed !!!! 

Willi
Willi Feb 2 '18
Now, if only that software were open-sourced instead of highly proprietary, some clever mind would likely find the bugs and make the whole suite run flawlessly. But alas ! The marriage licensing contract forbids disassembly under strictest penalties from legal professionals, who need to ensure all early termination fees are collected and diverted to the Attorney 6.66 and Divorcee{f} 0.47 beta investment applications.
The Forum post is edited by Willi Feb 2 '18

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